How can I get over someone I basically grew up with? He wasn't my 'first love' per se but it feels like it. Raph and I met 8 years ago -- we were classmates at Yamaha Katip while we were taking up guitar lessons. I didn't entertain him that much because I didn't really know how to deal with guys that time.. But I remember him treating me food and always waiting for me to be fetched before he heads home. Sweet, as always. I wasn't always sure of what was going on between us. We had a 'thing' when I was in second year highschool.. Also when I was in my third year and fourth. I always leave him with the thought in mind that he's just there when the right time comes. Come end of my first year in college, I was the one who courted him.. Lol. I just showed him how much I like him and luckily, he still likes me too. March 25, 2009 -- we became an official couple. "Can I be your boyfriend?" he asked. Without second thoughts, i said yes. Yup, I said yes with the help of McDo delivery and the lame movie "Chihuaha". The very first of many fail blogs happened that night. I don't want to write it here since super nakakahiya but I know he remembers. He surprises me a lot for the first few months and that made me realize that he really loves me and he wouldn't let go of our relationship that easy. We fought a lot as early as our second month but that didn't hinder us in trying to work things out because we both know that whatever happens, we'll still long for each other. We got fat togeUther since all we do was to eat like there's no tomorrow. We didn't care what others might say kasi baboy na kami because we accept naman each other even if we look like shit. I remember how his mom would tell us to go on a diet but that didn't stop us in eating everything and anything we see. Life was simple back then. We were contented with what he have. It was us against the world -- as other people would say it. He would get into fights with anyone for me.. Even with his mom. I'm not saying that it's what I wanted but I just saw and felt how much he loved me. If only we were as happy as before, we'll still be together now. We were a couple and at the same time, best friends. Considering that I'm a bit boyish and 'kupal', he was cool with it. We used to wrestle and he always practiced the moves he watched on WWE with me. Masakit, but it's okay. Hahaha! We used to play pretend that we're game show hosts while Ryan and his friends are outside the room. "Pera o Bayong" ang tema namin non. We were like little kids who played games until we get tired. We looked like fools with our games but we looked like fools TOGETHER. It's just fun to reminisce the good times Raph and I spent together. He was always the competitive type.. I used to always beat him in Fifa -- it made him play and practice til the break of dawn just to beat me the next day. He ALWAYS invite me to play Modern Warfare with him because he knows na no match ako sakanya. Lol. It's just fun to see him happy because he won against me. what he doesn't know is I just let him win. Kidding. :)) He loves zombies as much as I'm scared of them. Oh my God! I remember him acting like a zombie EVERYTIME we're together. The worst time he did that was when we were walking back to his house from katip -- Walking Dead ang peg omg! I remember crying every time he turned into a zombie then he'll just hug me tas zombie na naman siya. Nakakainis. Haha. We dance together kahit muka kaming tanga na feeling breakdancers. We make fun of people but mostly ako lang.. He still loves me nevertheless. We'd rather spend time with each other than go to our friends' parties because... We're both lazy. We'll drink together as in 1-on-1 mucho to mucho.. We used to have conversations about our exes or people we have a crush on like we're just friends. The thing that I really like about the relationship that we had was that I can be myself whenever I'm with him.. Not until everything turned 180 degrees. We were too complacent with each other. The things that we used to enjoy together suddenly became boring. I don't know what really happened. It's just like nawalan siya ng gana? Just like that, our relationship began whirling down the drain. He stopped texting me, stopped updating me and the like. I felt pa nga na he didn't want to spend some quality time with me. Sad. I didn't see this coming and until now, I'm still shocked with what happened between us. I don't understand why this has happened and it's really hard for me to accept the fact that the fun relationship I used to have with him is now over. Is it wrong if I'm still hoping that we'll get back together? No matter how fucked up our relationship was, I still believe that everything will be alright and we're really meant for each other. ..but he thinks/believes otherwise. I hope he believed in this relationship as much as I did. Things are different now nga lang.. Sabi nga nya, 'artista' na sya and maraming syang kasamang chics. Well, i don't know. For keeps VS for keps. I'll be okay in time.. I hope. Mag aartista din ako. I'll shine brighter than sunshine. Whuuut. Kk.
